Better Broken

Though I am not a scruffy homeless person, I am a University student and this should tell you a few things about me…

I think education is essential to improve one’s self. I know more about the BU website than is safe or necessary. I am unreasonably cryptic.

And I am almost always in some state of being broke.

Penniless. Most, if not all of my money goes to pay for things like school and books. Whatever is left over strangely gets eaten up by rent and (hopefully) food. That means I don’t get nice things, practically ever. The last nice thing I had was a small RC car that was destroyed in another late night drinking/engineering fit, trying to create a way to have a remote control light switch. I miss that car. And having electricity in my room. That was convenient if nothing else.

But at the same time I take a lot of pride in the small amount of shabby stuff I do own. My car is practically unsafetyable, my computer is chipped, cracked and ugly similar to the state of my phone, my shoes are mostly glue and almost all of my clothes are in some state of disrepair.

But, it’s not actually as bad as I (or you) think. By owning this stuff, I have absolutely no expectations about it at all. They’re toast, and the understanding of this comes with a certain irresponsibility towards them. I can do the bare minimum taking care of them and be assured that they will still work. My car, for example, is twenty-six years old. It is older than I am, Stuff is falling off of it, it makes dangerously unique noises and every time one of those noises starts a few weeks later, it will either fix itself of fall off. It is kind of like a lazy form of helpful entropy but I would gamble that this car will still outlive me.

My stuff is broken, like I am and I am completely okay with that. I don’t expect anything other than these things to be broken or to break some more. That means there is very little disappointment in my life. It is kind of liberating actually.