Q-Mail: Replaced?

Dear Quintilius,

How did you come to replace our beloved Glow Cloud who answered our questions last year?

Sincerely, Missing Glowy


Dear Glowy,

It is evident you must have been living under a rock these past few centuries or you would be aware how blatantly ignorant your question is.

I am Quintilius, son of the Titan Saturn, half brother to the God Jupiter. I put the Q in SPQR because I didn’t like how SPR looked branded into my chest, I sucked upon the teat of Lupa before it was cool and it was I who first spread salt on the barbarous lands of Carthage. I have impregnated princesses across foreign lands and in the process had to slay hundreds of dragons. I even killed a few of those flying fire-breathing lizard things.

I am a time traveling legend amongst Deities, and you have the nerve to ask how I replaced your beloved Glow Cloud? Well my dear I’ll tell you… I simply handed in my resume, had my interview, and waited 4-6 weeks to get my call back informing me I got the gig. So, boom! How you like dem apples?

All Salute The Eternal City,

Quintilius of Rome